


Spread Your Wings (Secret Agent AU)

by LoreNotVore



Series: FWOAN gen1 AUs by the CEO of them (+low-quality memes) [1]
Category: Original Work, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, gen1 you owe me prawn crackers, the most messed-up found family you've ever seen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-13 14:29:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29403417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoreNotVore/pseuds/LoreNotVore
Summary: Sleepy was having a good time at school, just studying with her friends in the library, when she was given an offer she just couldn't not accept. She wonders how she met this wonderful place.Funky wasn't sure if he was fit for the secret agent life, but if his friends were going to go, then he might as well follow them. He wonders how everything could've been different.Jesse was intrigued by the idea of employees who are everything and nothing like the stereotypical federal officers in movies, so he said yes. He wonders what it's like to feel free.Three teens, two decisions, and one FWOAN to change their lives.(summary will be updated as the story progresses!)
Series: FWOAN gen1 AUs by the CEO of them (+low-quality memes) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2160012
Comments: 7
Kudos: 25





	1. little birdie in the sky I

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Forest Without A Name gen1](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Forest+Without+A+Name+gen1).



> guess who spent their work and free time doing this *tired finger guns*

Emma “Sleepy” Sleepinq liked to believe that she was a very down-to-earth person.

The fourteen-year-old girl liked technology. She played piano well and was good with people. She had one brother that she was irritated by, two friends who were her entire world, and three principles that she based her life around.

Number one; follow the seven habits of highly effective people. Be proactive, begin with the end in mind, put first things first, think win-win, understand then be understood, synergize, and renew yourself regularly. Simple enough, right? Just seven characteristics of her life.

Number two; strive for success but let yourself live a little. Sleepy knew that to get far in life, you needed to have that mindset. Push yourself, but not too hard. Procrastinate a little every now and then, but manage to get things done before the deadline. Party it up but get your homework finished before dinner. 

Number three;  _ never completely trust strangers _ . People always approached you with a goal in mind, from something as harmless as knowing where the bathroom was, to something as kind as wanting to make a friend, to something wicked and of ill intent. Relax around your friends and keep your guard up when talking to others.

One of these three principles were not followed today. 

_ Huh, she wondered why. _

It was a calm and sunny afternoon and Sleepy was doing her technology homework at one of the library computers after school, her friends Jesse and Funky at a neighboring table. The two were pouring their time and effort into their National History Day research project, making sure the display they made was absolutely perfect. She sighed fondly as the two quietly bickered about what color borders they should put on their images.

The girl added another function call in her Java program as the duo besides her ended up choosing a light silver-blue. She decided to work on her own NHD project later, having chosen a website to build about the Chinese Exclusion Act. This year’s theme was prejudice, and her friends who shared a single brain cell decided to work together with the topic of Rosa Parks.

(Funky and Jesse had nearly chosen Jane Goodall, and they were sure lucky that she had the heart to tell them, lightheartedly, “Goodall was the scientist that studied chimpanzees, you buffoons. At least those primates had a higher IQ than you.”)

She heard the little bell to the main entrance of the library ding. Sleepy had been informed by the head librarian that there would be an important visitor today, the daughter of the president of the Board, and she was determined to make a good first impression.

“Hello, Miss Star Russell!” she smiled as she stood up from her seat to greet the lady, eyes quickly scanning the VIP visitor badge. “I’m Sleepy, a librarian assistant. How may I help you? Are you enjoying your visit to Twitch Middle and High so far?”

“Please, call me Star,” responded the blonde, lifting a finger to what appeared to be a wireless earpiece and tapping it twice. “It seems to be great, but I was wondering if you could show me around the school so I can get to know it a bit more?” 

“Of course, let me just tell my friends real quick,” she answered. Sleepy speed-walked to Funky and Jesse’s table, quickly informing them of where she was going. The two gave her matching tired thumbs-ups as they went back to gluing pictures onto cardboard.

She heard Star call out, “Actually, can those two come with us as well?” Shrugging, Sleepy gauged her friends’ reactions. They blinked drowsily and stared at Star, before staring at each other, before agreeing to the proposition. The woman dragged the three of them through the hallways, before finally reaching a section of the school without people sprawled on the floor.

“ _ Unholly, disable security _ ,” Star whispered, tapping that earpiece of hers again. The blonde grinned when the old security cameras whirred to a stop. Sleepy’s eyes flickered from the cameras to her earpiece.

“Um, what’s going on?” Funky asked, shuffling his feet. He was calm enough, but she could see the panicked calculation in her friend’s eyes. Jesse, on the other hand, shifted his stance to a subtly defensive one, fidgeting with his hands.

“... impressive,” the girl finally said to Star. “You have top-notch technology that’s not available on the markets yet. I didn’t think that would exist.” Funky looked at her with an  _ I-told-you-so _ expression, as she shot back a  _ sure, Conspiracy Whore. _

“So!” the woman beamed, shoving a square of blue metal in their faces. “I’m Stella Selene, Agent Stella from the Fortification Without A Name, division Gen 1, and a Bird of Prey. My field is, well, field. We BoPs have decided that we’re all Big Bird because his 1845 kill streak is impressive. Here, let me give you some temporary earpieces connected to channel 2.”

The three only stared, Jesse warily taking the earpieces.

“Anyways, my friend Agent Unholly and I think you two are gits- I mean,  _ fit _ to be trainees, AKA Birbs, at FWOAN! We do a  _ lot _ of research beforehand. Since you were scouted by me, you’ll be part of the strongest branch, Gen 1. I’ll get someone your age to show you the ropes and the orientation film.”

More confused staring.

“C’mon, give me some emotion!” she complained. “Right now, you guys are just like M- I mean, Pestilence. He’s always just dead inside and refuses hugs.” An awkward silence followed after, the four not knowing what to say.

“ _ Okay _ ,” Jesse said tentatively, Funky examining her badge thoroughly. It had Stella’s picture and name on it, with the words  _ Agent Stella 90 _ ,  _ Bird of Prey _ , and  _ Field  _ under the image.  _ FWOAN GEN1 _ was written across the top in caps, next to a round logo—a yellow hooded blackbird resting on a twig with a green background. “I mean, sounds festive.”

“Um, if my friends go, I’ll go too,” Sleepy shrugged before her eyes lit up as she realized what this meant. “Hey, are there, like, hackers and coders? I want to check that stuff out! I’ve always  _ dreamed _ of seeing and interacting with such amazing software in person!”

“Unholly? When we get back, can you show Sleepy the top tech team and how they work?” asked Stella. The other agent answered with a loud crash and “ _ Sure, sure, one moment! _ ”

“Wait, can I ask you about something?” Funky probed. When Stella nodded, he continued, “Is your code name Stella just to confuse the enemy? Like, some type of reverse psychology? It’s quite genius, actually. Like, it’s so painfully obvious that Unholly’s name is Holly, so do you make these fake names on purpose?”

Stella blanked.

“Um, no, we just thought it was funny.

“Anyways! Unholly, can you get someone to pick these two up, preferably someone ‘responsible’ like RA? Can they come?”

“One Gremlin coming your way from a nearby Dunkin’ Donuts in van 27, with OWO—ugh, I need to bleach my mouth—as tech support,” the girl on the other side of the earpieces said, rapidly typing on a loud keyboard as screams were heard in the background. “They  _ would _ have taken a different one, but a certain Ninjago Advocate wiped out 25 and took 24 and 26 with it. I’d give a B+ for the explosion; beautiful but kind of messy.”

“...  _ explosion _ ?!”

Stella shrugged and quickly ushered the three outside, telling them not to panic if they got pulled into a dark van and shoving a card in Jesse’s hands. With a two-fingered salute, she was gone, having slipped back into the school for more recruits.

Sleepy examined the card, which was really just a piece of plastic with words on it. It stated that FWOAN would take care of the school system’s attendance and whatnot, and send a fake report card to their parents every semester. They would also receive private tutors for free and finish school years early, as well as be trained in specific areas.

“Should we really be doing this?” Funky asked, leaning against a water fountain in front of the school building. “Even if they’re not tricking us or anything, and they probably aren’t because of that power play shown back there in the hallway, you know how hard being just law enforcement is. There’s nothing special about us, either.” He pressed the button and drank from the fountain.

Jesse looked at the card full of information about the FWOAN program and offered a simple, “How do you feel about a hundred dollars an hour with provided housing and food?”

Funky choked on the water.

Sleepy whistled lowly, calculating in her head. That was half the  _ daily  _ income of an average adult, and as minors their age, they could work up to forty hours a week, which gave them a yearly salary of two hundred eight thousand five hundred seventy-one dollars,  _ four times _ the median  _ household  _ income.

“I’m definitely in,” she grinned, giving in to all of the benefits. Free private tutoring, surrounded by and doing what she loved, amazing pay, and provided housing which no doubt would be  _ amazing _ ? This was a great deal that even an idiot wouldn’t pass up on.

Funky had finished sputtering and opened his mouth to say something when he was yanked into a black van, a gloved hand over his mouth to stifle his screams.

Sleepy tried to remain calm, remembering what Stella had told them, but Jesse apparently didn’t remember as he was pulled into the (moving) vehicle next. She was hauled into it last, though less roughly than the others had been handled.

“Hello there!” a person who Sleepy assumed was Agent OWO grinned. She had a mask resembling a raven’s face with the “owo” emoticon sloppily painted on in what seemed to be Wite-Out. The person driving, theoretically Agent Responsible Adult(an ironic name), had their feet propped on the dashboard as they twisted their body awkwardly to turn the steering wheel of the van.

The car itself was spacious and had five computer setups, one driver’s seat, and a large U-shaped seat in the back, next to the trunk. The hardware was strapped down to desks in front of various different chairs, everything on the floor bolted to the side or bottom of the automobile. 

The ride to Gen 1 Headquarters was about forty-five minutes long, from District Twitch to YT. Sleepy was messing with the computers the entire time, in awe of the amazing technology this FWOAN had. There were precoded hack clients, ways to mess with the enemy, and it was even possible to get into the system of another van.

Jesse and Funky were kind of nodding off, clearly amused and bemused by OWO and RA’s witty banter. The constant quips were kind of comforting, in a weird way, because the two agents were obviously good friends and worked well together.

“Hey, what do you want your code name to be?” RA whispered to Sleepy, not wanting to wake the two others. She shrugged in response, thinking about all the made-up names she used in roleplays and video games.

“Um, Altair, I guess?” she shrugged again. “That’s what I named my character in D&D.”

“ _ ‘Bird’ _ or  _ ‘soar’  _ in Latin, and  _ ‘The Flying One’ _ in Arabic. Also a star. Nice,” OWO grinned, typing something into her computer. “Your code name has been added to the databases. Since you’re a Birb, or a trainee, your auto-generated ‘serial name’ of sorts is ES.”

“Welcome to FWOAN, Agent Altair ES!” RA mirrored the other agent’s happy expression as they high-fived her, and Emma Sleepinq felt something warm bubble in her chest as she failed to hide her giddy smile.

They arrived in a forest ten minutes later, Sleepy gently shaking Funky and Jesse awake. The former blinked at the trees around them, adjusting to the lighting, then stared at an awkwardly-bent tree branch.

“That’s kind of off,” he said, pointing to it. “Is it some kind of secret lever? Since you’re all top-secret-y and stuff?”

“Now that you say it, it does look kind of weird,” Jesse added, measuring the angle between the branch and the trunk of the tree with his hands. “Do you have to, like, scan your badge on something?”

RA and OWO beamed at each other. The former took out their badge and pressed it to the bark of the “off” tree, then pulled the branch down. Metal gears became visible and a section of the ground in front of them rose up to show a silver elevator.

“ _ Awesome _ ,” Sleepy breathed.

RA pressed their right thumb to a cyan screen, scanning their fingerprint. The doors opened to reveal a larger-than-usual cab, which the two agents stepped into and gestured for Sleepy and Funky to do the same.

“Since you’re part of FWOAN now, you can know our real names. I’m Raeven, but you can call me Rae, and this is Calisis. Anyways, Holly promised to give you a tour of the tech stuff and the top tech team, so you go with me and her,” OWO said to Sleepy, pressing the button for the fifth floor. The latter nodded and fidgeted with the hem of her shirt.

“Funky and Jesse, you’ll come with me,” Calisis said to the other two, texting somebody while grinning wickedly. “I’ll introduce you to Crow and Techno-chan. Opposites attract, after all.”

“Uh, Cal, I don’t think that’s a — you know what, sure,” Rae caved in. “They’re our top interrogators and kind of wild, but less than Stella when she can take off the ‘agent’ facade,” she explained to a confused Jesse. 

The elevator  _ dinged _ and the doors opened just as someone clad in stereotypical ninja clothes and wearing a TV over their head jumped down from the ceiling, a Nerf gun in their arms.

“GIVE ME YOUR KNEECAPS!” they screeched, cocking the gun and aiming at Calisis’s legs, as an East-Asian girl with black hair and a neon pink highlight laughed her head off.

To Funky’s credit, he didn’t jump like Sleepy did, but he flinched and stared like a deer caught in headlights. The girl with the pink streak noticed him and grinned.

“MY SON!” she yelled, even though she was probably younger than him. “ _ I will bake you many sand cookies! Come, let us steal kneecaps with Crow! _ ”

“Um, sure?” Funky replied, kind of just giving in as the girl dragged him to the right.

“ _ Yes, many kneecaps! _ ” Crow crowed(pun not intended), firing foam darts everywhere with one hand and grabbing Jesse with the other. “ _ WE WILL START OUR OWN EMPIRE! SCREW MCYT, THE KNEECAP NATION SHALL TAKE OVER! _ ”

Sleepy could only gape as the  _ boisterous _ TV-head guy ranted about how delicious kneecaps were.

“The TV-kneecaps one was Crow Gōstburr, with a horizontal line over the o, and the girl was Techa Miichan, who’s obsessed with theme songs and alternate universes. They’re kind of chaotic when meeting new people, but you should see how stoic they are during missions,” Calisis laugh-sighed, running after them.

“Let’s ignore that,” Rae smiled tightly(not in annoyance but to avoid bursting into laughter), clasping her hands together. She led a very confused and drained Sleepy down the left hall, the steel walls of the corridor filled with screens and posters. They stopped at room 5JD.

“Are you ready to meet the greatest tech team of all time?” she grinned, badge resting on the scan-locked handle. Rae turned the metal handle down and pushed the door in with a little flair.

Inside the  _ extremely _ large room, computers and desks were shoved aside carelessly. A girl was sitting at the top of a chair tower in the middle of the room, the tower wobbling dangerously as she caught a chocolate chip cookie in her mouth. The guy who tossed it to her did a baseball slide on the ground and thrust his hands in the air as others cheered loudly like their team just won the Super Bowl.

Rae coughed.

The stacked chairs toppled over, sending the girl to the floor with a loud crash. Sleepy winced at the loud noise.

“And  _ this _ is FWOAN’s greatest tech team,” Rae sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose and looking at the floor to hide her grin. The other members of the tech team smiled sheepishly, one of them popping a gingerbread man into their mouth and chewing loudly.

“Hi!” the girl who had collided onto the floor greeted, stuck between various wheeled chairs. “Ignore this 20E please!” Sleepy recognized her as the agent that had talked to them through the earpieces when they were still at Twitch Middle/High.

“ _ AGENT UNHOLLY! _ ” someone yelled. “ _ YOU HAVE A CODE 99A FOR THE FIFTH TIME THIS MONTH! _ ”

“Oh, fuck my life.”


	2. little birdie in the sky II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> funky has a crisis lmao

Funky didn’t regret being born. He didn’t regret becoming the person he is now, he didn’t regret befriending Sleepy and Jesse, and he didn’t regret joining FWOAN.

One thing he sure  _ did  _ regret was letting Techa and Crow drag him and Jesse throughout the halls of FWOAN, chanting some Phineas and Ferb theme song parody.

The two pulled him into a large room, the boy barely managing to catch a glimpse of the sign on the door labeling the room as 5YK. He blinked to adjust to the low lighting of the area filled with various computer setups that Sleepy would’ve gushed over. The soft whirring of exhaust fans accompanied the bubbling of test tubes heating over a burner, and Techa bent down to type something in front of a computer monitor. She said something about combat to Crow, who nodded and guided Jesse to another room. 

“So,” she grinned, almost falling on her butt before she realized that there wasn’t a chair near her, “Stella told me you seemed smart. Are you good with numbers and information?”

Funky blinked, not expecting that question. “ _...I guess _ ? I like calculating analytics and processing information. I also have a good memory.” And that was true, if you ignored the fact that he would sometimes walk into a room and forget what he was going to do.

“Great!” beamed Techa, who shoved a mouse into his hands. “Take this long quiz to make sure you won’t regret working on the ever-growing FWOAN databases.” He blinked again before sitting down in the chair that an unfamiliar brunette who appeared out of nowhere had offered him, the girl wearing a shirt with the bold words “STELLA’S BITCH” on it.

_ Question 1 out of 42: Do you want to hit things?  _

_ A) ofc  
_ _ B) wtf no  
_ _ C) guns work better  
_ _ D) i think whip and nae nae _

The confused boy chose option B before moving on to the next problem.

_ Question 2 out of 42: Drog  _

_ A) yes  
_ _ B) drog  
_ _ C) hits the woah in confusion  
_ _ D) stella is the best and the man _

Funky thought he heard the faint sound of snickering as he clicked choice A.

_ Question 3 out of 42: Ideal gen1 funny man  _

_ A) cilantro </3  
_ __ B) so polygonal mmm  
_ C) *nae naes*  
_ __ D) animorphs but garlic bread

He breathed a sigh of frustration.

After thirty-nine more questions like this, one asking “how many platonic marriages have occurred” and another stating “true or false: feet pics are better than kneecaps” with every option other than true or false, Funky was absolutely drained. He was losing brain cells rapidly and if he saw “nae nae” one more time he would  _ scream _ .

“What do you think of that poll I made?” the brunette chuckled, twirling a bracelet with many silver charms in the shape of feet ( _ his eye twitched in annoyance _ ). “And if you didn’t like it, don’t worry, we’ll rub onto you and you’ll become one of us.”

“Tumors,” Techa added without context.

Funky was then handed a certificate by the girl, which said “Congratulations, You Passed Carly’s Hellish Test Without Cardiac Arrest.” He couldn’t help but wheeze at a picture of The Rock with a photoshopped fish head giving him a thumbs up, a text bubble making him say “stop floundering around.” 

Maybe he  _ was  _ part-sponge and had absorbed some of Carly’s humor after taking that quiz.

The said girl then grabbed his arm and pulled him into the hallway and up the corridors. Carly scanned her badge on a cyan screen to call an elevator. About a minute later, the doors opened with a dinging noise and the two stepped into the car.

“Databases, huh?” she said nonchalantly, pressing the button for the twentieth floor. “Interesting. I heard that Wondrous was the one who created the giant info archive FWOAN has and that she checks up on it every now and then even though she doesn’t work in that field anymore.”

Funky offered a nod, opting to stare at his reflection on the metal walls of the compartment. Could this person really become a secret agent of sorts? Maybe he could help his family if they ever were short on money. He  _ had _ gotten into Twitch Middle/High by a scholarship, after all.

The doors opened and the strong smell of old paper hit Funky’s nose. The carpeted floors of the hallway eventually led to heavy double doors that Carly scanned her badge on to open, a small plaque labeling the place as 20VC. Inside was a large and round room, the dim walls being lit up by many screens bolted to the metal. A lone figure was at the center of the room, sitting on a pink spinning chair and typing away, the occasional side profile of a random person appearing on a monitor.

“Hey, Carol!” Carly called, grinning. “I found someone who’s willing to work on this archive with you!” The girl turned to face them and Funky thought he saw a gleam of relief in her eyes.

“Oh, Nameless,  _ finally _ ,” she groaned. “I practically  _ live _ here now. There are so little people who see the importance of a rich database and they all choose multiple fields like deception or intelligence. Anyways, heyo, I’m Carol Lina and Agent John, but you can refer to me as Wondrous.”

Funky shook her hand and gawked at the dome-like displays, not even noticing when Carly had slipped out of the room. Some of the monitors were currently on a screensaver, the words “Archive of My Own” bouncing around, while others had tabs of random files open to show all the information they had on some person.

“Well, now that you’re here, I’ll rename it to ‘Archive of  _ Our _ Own,’” said Carol, taking a sip of coffee from a large mug and typing a couple of letters, pressing the enter key. The black-and-green screensavers turned to white and maroon red and she leaned back into her unicorn gaming chair. “Humph, when the field agents finally realize how crucial all this information is, I might just not help them.”

Carol then showed him all the different parts of the archive that she had made, the entire thing on an offshore server that was rebooted every weekend. Funky tried his best to memorize all of the little details of the Birds of Preys, which were promoted agents that had been at FWOAN for a long time. Birbs were trainees and recruits like him, while Birds were members that were between the aforementioned two ranks.

“-and Drog is like Stella’s lifeline, so be sure to give him pets,” Carol rambled, spilling a lot of the tea she had on the members. “Oh, and if you ever see this tall and creepily pale guy wearing a plague doctor mask, that’s Uncle Mercury. He literally  _ sleeps _ with that thing on. The self-proclaimed ‘Four Pretty Best Friends’ once hot-glued a bunch of pink yarn on it and called him Mercury on a String for  _ weeks _ after.”

“‘Four Pretty Best Friends?’” asked Funky, shifting his weight from one foot to another. “Who are they?”

“Oh, they’re Stella, Aspen, Carly, and Holly,” she responded,“and they’re known for their chaos and pranks. Aspen doesn’t usually join in unless it’s something related to arson. You have no idea how many 23Ks she has on her record.” Carol paused to look at a small clock she had on her desk.

“Time for you to go get your badge! Here’s a temporary pass for new Birbs.” And with that, Funky was ushered out of the room.

Badge? Where should he go to get his badge? He pretty much had an idea of how large GEN1 was, and that did not give him high hopes of finding that place in time. 

Luckily for him, the inside of the elevator cars had lists of the floors and descriptions for their purposes. Five was computer and lab stuff, twenty was the archive and library, and seven was the office floor. There was a small note stating that Birbs had to go get their badge made and picture taken at Ideal’s office, so he pressed the button for the seventh floor, looking at his pass in the meantime.

It was two sheets of tough plastic encasing a microchip and just about thick enough to barely hide the complicated wiring in it. Yellow words on a black background said “BIRB PASS” across the card. Funky tucked it into the front pocket of his jeans.

The doors opened and he accidentally stumbled into a tall, creepily-pale man wearing a plague doctor mask and a tuxedo.

Oh. Mercury.

Mercury seemed to stare at him before awkwardly offering a hand, which Funky accepted with the same amount of awkwardness. The eye holes of the mask seemed to flicker towards the pass in his pocket, and the man led him down the hallways, quietly understanding.

“Thank you, sir,” Funky quickly said. “I’m Funky, and you are?”

“Mercury,” he responded in a deep voice, tone unintentionally clipped. “Uh, I’m kind of the uncle around here, just so you know. You can call me Uncle Mercury. You’re a new Birb, right? Did Stella bring you in?”

“Yup,” Funky replied, popping the p. He had a feeling that even if he hadn’t affirmed Uncle Mercury’s rhetorical question, the man still would’ve known. “Apparently I work in databases now. Carol, or Wondrous, said I needed to get my badge? And the elevator floor list said that I should go to the office of someone called Ideal.”

Mercury’s blank mask didn’t show any emotion. “Ah, about that; he’s dealing with Holly’s fifth 99A and third 38I of the month so he asked me to cover for him. Here’s the office, I guess.”

It was an average office with a standard PC, TV monitor, and printer, but there was also a white backdrop and box-shaped camera on a tripod in a corner of the room. A smaller printer was hooked to the camera and a laptop. Mercury gestured for him to sit on a chair in front of the camera thing.

Funky awkwardy looked into the lenses of the camera and heard a  _ click _ , followed by the noise of something printing in the smaller printer. A navy blue leather square was ejected from the bottom of it.

He looked at his new badge; it was tougher than other kinds of leather, like it was coated in something, and a clear picture of the front of his face in the middle.  _ Funky Cardhouses, Agent Pog FC, Birb, Databases. _

_ Pog _ ? He didn’t remember even creating a code name, so he guessed Techa or Carly had something to do with this. Eh, who really cared? Carol had said that many people have changed their code names after growing out of their “childhood cringe phase,” and you get a new badge when you retake your picture after a drastic change in physical appearance.

“So, are you done now?” asked Uncle Mercury, who was... playing mobile Monopoly? “I think you still have to see the orientation film with other new recruits, but that’s after dinner, so you’re free to go wherever you want until you hear the announcement for it at around six or seven. It’s on the second floor, by the way.”

Funky thanked the masked man, who nodded curtly, and made his way out of the room. He scanned his new badge on the panel in front of the elevators, and he waited for the car to arrive. Stepping into the compartment, the Birb pressed the button for floor 20. He recalled wooden doors that showed a large library when he was being led to room 20VC, and Funky wanted to read a bit about the history of FWOAN. That is, if there were any books about it.

To his delight, there were. Waving to the random blonde skimming through a biology textbook, he pulled out a medium-sized hardback titled “The Fortification Without a Name and A Nameless With a Mission.” It described how a demifemale with she/they pronouns named Wolfy Wyche started a company, keeping it nameless, before using that company to found and fund FWOAN in hopes of protecting the state of MCYT from harm.

He sat down and read, and for the first time in a week, Funky was at peace.

(That is, until someone screeched  _ NAMES JAMES IS HAVING A STRONK, CALL A BONDULANCE! _ )

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wrote this in one afternoon and then my dad cut my wifi :screm:  
> 23K=unauthorized arson

**Author's Note:**

> code 20E = horsing around  
> code 99A = secret info is threatened  
> Hope you enjoyed the first chapter! DM me if you want to ask or suggest anything :D you know who I am


End file.
